To rely on someone means to DEPEND on them.

When a child is born, for the first few years, it is totally RELIANT, it depends totally on its mother for nourishment, clothes, warmth, love and affection.

Allah has given us a life where we are born dependant; when we become adults, others are dependant on us (like our children), and finally when we become old, we are again dependant on others due to our frailty.

Figure 1: The circle of life
So life is like a circle, where we move from one position to another, eventually coming back to the point at which we started.

When we are children, and cannot look after ourselves, we are call dependants. Islam teaches us that we should grow out of this stage, and learn to be capable to look after ourselves.

This stage is called SELF RELIANCE, and means to do as much as we can by ourselves. It does NOT mean doing ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING by ourselves. We should not go and ignore help or aid from another.

Some people have a habit that the minute they want something, they will ask someone to do it for them, even if they can do it themselves. They do not mean to be bossy, or rude.

This is a dreadful habit, and leads to people avoiding them.

Islamic etiquette (Akhlaq) teaches us that we should not ask others to do for us what we can do for ourselves, even if we have to go out of our way a little. There are certain groups of people that this does not apply to, like parents, the elderly, those who are handicapped in some way.

Thus we should be self-reliant whenever we can.

HOW DOES THIS APPLY TO US?

It means that we should make our own beds in the mornings, clean our own rooms, wash our own dishes, do our own chores. We should not expect others to follow us around making sure that our duties are performed for us, that is of course unless we are still little children.

Some people take self-reliance too far. Islam explains us that no matter how old we are, our parents still have authority over us. Being older, they have more experience and know (in most cases) what is better for us. Still however, some children will reply to their parents that they know best, and that they will do whatever they want because they are adults now.

We should realise that the we are DEPENDANT ON ONLY ONE THING, and that is Allah.

No matter how well off we are, or how much we can do for ourselves, we owe our very existence to Allah, who not only created us, but is keeping us alive, every moment.

It was a long journey. At one place, they all decided to rest. The Prophet (S) and his companions alighted from their horses and loosened their luggage. Then they decided to slaughter an animal and prepare a meal. One companion said: "I will slaughter the animal."

Another said: "And I will skin it."

The third one volunteered to cook the meat. And so everyone volunteered to help in one-way or the other.

The Prophet (S) said: "I will go to find the fuel."

Immediately the companions rose to say

Then he went towards the woods and brought back with him twigs and thorns which he had gleaned.